When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong

My friend Robert over at his blog Robert's Rules of Order had a great post that his friend Chris did on Facebook Etiquette that I just had to share, cause I know you sometimes think the same thing!

FACEBOOK STATUS 101

Aight, Im about to go over some things that you should NOT do when making a status. I see waaayyy too many foolish statuses, stuff I shouldnt see, so if you wanna get a status like mine, you gotta pay attention..

RULE #1 - WTF
D0 N0+ wr1t3 y0ur [s t a t u s] <<>>. Th@t $hi+ i$ @NNOYiNG as ***H3LL*** & iT T@K3S {FOREVER} 2 r3ad...& iTS n0t 3V3N .:CUTE:. (that took dayum near 10 mins to do)

RULE #2 - SHORT STATUSES
Don't be lazy and write a short status. (CORNELIUS is tired...) WHAT THE F***??? thats a waste...at least try, thats pitiful...

RULE #3 - TOO MUCH INFO
ok now a status is a good way to let ppl know what ur doing at the time, but we dont need to know EVERYTHANG...EVERYTHANG???? EVERYTHANG. We dont need to know everything about ur personal life.
(SHONSHEKA just came back from the maury show and still dont know who my baby daddy is but we gon find that nicca...REAL TALK)
first of all, if ya say REAL TALK, i prolly wont trust ya....and we just dont need to know all that

RULE #4 - WAY TOO SERIOUS
Facebook is not a way to declare war on ur worst enemy...this is mostly girls, dudes dont really hold grudges like that
(TAMIA bustitbaby JENKINS is finna cut dat ho remekia if she fukk wit my nicca laron one mo giiinn...i wish i would see dat bytch again, ill judochop her azz in the fukkin ovary, try me ho...)
You really dont need to make your beef wit Remekia a public thing...handle that somwhere else, take that ignant shyt to myspace...

Once, I find some more, I will let you know...102 is on the way

TIPS
- You can always put some hip-hop lyric in there...thats always good. (CHRIS hits niccas in the head like vonage...

- KATT WILLIAMS...everything that comes out that dudes mouth is hilarious, you cant go wrong
(CHRIS is in tune wit his star fukkin player....)

FACEBOOK STATUS 102

prerequisite: FACEBOOK STATUS 101 (must have a grade of "C" or higher) and some of yall didnt pass, so dont read this one...u gotta go back and retake 101

"LOVEY DOVEY" STATUSES
oooo this is gon be awhile...
Aight, I see too much of this goin on. I'm not telling you to not love ur boyfriend or girlfriend, I'm not even tellin you not to say out loud that u love ur boyfriend or girlfriend...but dont LIE YOUR AZZ OFF
(TYLICKA believes that this man was sent by GOD just for me, i think about u every 13 seconds, i just cant get u off my mind, aint it good when GOD just send u the perfect man)
AWWW, that shyt makes me sick...i can see that if you 35, but u are NINETEEN years old, you are NOT about to marry that man, get over urself...(he must be puttin it DOWN)

HOLY STATUSES
Aight, church people stay wit me...its perfectly fine to have a status wit a bible verse in it, or saying how much u love the LORD and GOD and everything (i need to more, but im a horrible Christian)
but if you got a status like (LA'TRANSPANISHA is very blessed...GOD is good to me everyday)...dont let me catch u the next night in club continental, half naked, dry humpin every dude in arms-reach...WE ALREADY KNOW U DONT KNOW A DAYUM THING ABOUT JESUS...DONT FRONT

CURSING IN YOUR STATUS
Thats just not smart...a LOT of ppl look at facebook, more ppl than you realize
(LaDARIUS is the freshest motherfucker on the planet...yall aint got shit on me, i need to change my middle name to bitches, cuz i fuck so many bitches)
Uhhhh...ive heard some employers will look at a applicant's facebook before they hire them...and if you got a status like that...dont expect to get a call back (matta fact, i might have lost my job just by writin that shyt...i used a "Y")

"AINT NO GOOD MEN"
Yeh, im bout to go there...this is prolly the most popular status on facebook. Ive seen it all
(SHAUNTRISHA is tired fake niccas...are theyre any real niccas out there?)
(CHAPEL doesnt think i will ever find my MR RIGHT, ive looked everywhere, ive been to club continental, the furnace, volcano...i dont think it will happen)
(JAYSSEIKAH thinks that aint no good men out there)
ok, i wont stay on this too long...ima just give some advice, dont look for your future husband at continental, the furnace, volcano, legion field, bartow arena, bryant denny stadium, jordan-hare stadium...
try some new places...this may be a stretch for some of yall but try the LIBRARY, BOOKS-A-MILLION, THE CIVIL RIGHTS MUSEUM, CHURCH (not 6th Avenue hahaha)...find u a nicca that can READ, yall lookin for muscles and shyt, anybody can get big, but u cant go to the weight room and get rid of STUPID, theres no workout program for that...



Also, ummm u can get rid of the "is" on the little status bar, some ppl dont realize that yet...
(BECKY is I said its great to be a Briarwood Lion...)
theres no excuse for that...erase the "is"

FACEBOOK STATUS 201 is next...i think u gotta sign up for a lab with that one too tho, check back wit me...

FACEBOOK STATUS 201

this note was prolly more anticipated than Drake's debut album...(not for real), ok let's get it

PREREQUISITE: FACEBOOK STATUS 101 & FACEBOOK STATUS 102 (a grade of "C" or better)

Now, some of you cannot continue reading because you havent passed the other two classes. I $+i.l.l s33 t00 M@NY <<>> b3ing w*r*i*T*T*e*n [lik3 +hi$]. If I see another one like that...ima just call you out right on ur page, that shyt needs to stop...

1. TOO dayum LONG

Aight...so recently, Facebook allowed unlimited space for your status. But that does not mean, your status needs to be infinitely long. Im not surprised tho, thats just like niggas, give em an inch and they gon take a FOOT...

this is not a space for you to drop ur freestyle and try to get signed, and if ur name isnt Martin Bradley, you prolly cant flow no dayum way...not one nicca has ever been signed to a deal off a facebook freestyle. Also, we do not need to hear about how ur going to put it on ur boyfriend when u get off work...(that falls under the "TOO MUCH INFO" category which was discussed in 101, i believe...)

I'll admit I had a couple of long statuses myself but...im funny, so my shyt was very welcome haha

2. Underage & ALCOHOL

IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 21, PPPLLEEEASSSEEEEE dont write a status about how you got FREAKIN WASTED at that party last night. WTF do you wanna go to jail?? You couldnt wait for TI to get out, u had to go see him NOW???

(Becky Doolittle [Oak Mountain Junior High '14] was drunk off my ass last night in Tuscaloosa, i had like 5 shots of tequila, i think i hooked up wit Julio Jones, awesome")

First off, get off facebook and get that Plan B. I think i speak for all ALABAMA fans when i say, we dont need ur father chasing after Julio wit a shotgun tryna ruin Alabama's football season...
Second, WTH are you talkin about drinkin for out in the open...thats not cool

And, this is off-topic, a lil, but if you are ANY AGE, u should not be taking pictures of you with ANY KIND OF ALCOHOL, unless u applyin for a job at ABC Beverages, why the hell would u do that??? People look at this shyt, or so ive heard...(maybe thats not true at all, iono, somebody let me know)

3. Drake Lyrics

Lemme preface this one, by saying Drake is the hottest rapper out right now, and ima be the first one in line getting the album when it comes out...

now with that said, i should not surf around Facebook and see FIVE different ppl (true story) with the status "ITS OK, ITS OK, ITS OK, ITS OK, U CAN RUN AND TELL UR FRIENDS THAT IM ON, IM ON, IM ON, BEST BELIEVE I UNDERSTAND"

I mean...dat boy good, but DAYUM...i think its the cool thing now to like Drake, i see ppl who used to be writing Boosie and Plies lyrics on the status, now u puttin up DRAKE??? If you stupid enuff to like Boosie, aint no way in all of hell that you like Drake too...

As I see more problems with statuses, I will adress them...report them to me if you see them

Facebook 220???


now that yall read, there are no more excuses for unacceptable facebook statuses. if you cant follow the rules, i have mark zuckerberg's permission to remove you from the site. have a wonderful day :).

Whoops!

Sorry for the lack of updates, with my extra vacation days from work, memorial day and my boyfriend visiting I haven't had much time to do anything! But be in tune for more updates this week.

fabE

The CW Can Kick Rocks!

I’m heated!

The only and I mean the only decent black comedy/drama on TV now is cancelled.

The CW knows they’re some bitches, plain and simple.

First of the season finale of ‘The Game’ left us on the edge of our seats so now we can’t have an ending to our happily ever after Derwin and Melanie or see how much bitchassness Jason got in his system for leaving Kelly high and dry. Seriously CW??

Although maybe I shouldn’t be surprised, you saw what happened to ‘Girlfriends’. It’s just sad to see a great show be canned for shows like the NEW Melrose Place, isn’t 90210 enough? Now don’t get me wrong I do enjoy 90210 (when I actually watch it) and I’m starting to get hip to Gossip Girls but sorry CW, you’ve lost me. On top of that, they took away ‘Everybody Hates Chris’ which I enjoyed too! It just makes me realize that good black shows are becoming a mystery.

All I want to see is a mostly black cast in a drama, comedy whatever that’s NOT a reality show.

So what do you think KabQueens? Are black TV shows fading in the wind?

It looks about that way.


REST IN PEACE THE GAME

MELANIE AND DERWIN FOREVER!

KabQueens At Their Best!

So Janelle aka MsNels came to STL to pay us all a lovely visit...just wanted you all to see some of our fun, plus ya'll really don't see pics of us. Enjoy!

We get down...what can I say?

Mother's Day Brunch
Taking my mom and granny to paint pottery

Cute!
Me and moms made it a team effort in the end

Hope everyone is having a great day!

Attending...Maybe Not

You know what really grinds my gears? Event invites on Facebook. It irks me to no end!

Ever check your Facebook and on your homepage it’ll say 6 New Messages, you’re like ‘oh snap, who sent me a message??’ come to look on your message page and it’s ALL party promotions. And even if you decline the event they STILL send messages. Shouldn’t there be something that automatically erases events and all messages once you decline?

Oh and please don’t invite me to an event when you’re clearly in a different state. Am I really going to fly out there, is it really that important to me? Hell no! Now I know it can be a struggle for promoters. I know they wanna get the word out, get people to come but really guys, do we need the 10 messages throughout the day of the event. Don’t send me a message saying such and such event in less than 4 hours. Yes I know that, I see my clock, tell me something I don’t know. All the info I need to know is on the event page, so don’t send me anything else unless you’re telling me the event is cancelled, nothing more, nothing less. And doesn’t it irk you when different people send the same invite? It’s just too much, too much.

I just wanted to get that one out, share any of my pain? Let me know!

I Told Ya'll I Would Do It

Changed the background pic again, I like it more this time, especially Grace Jones....you know she is truly a KabQueen doing what she wants, when she wants, however she wants to do it. Okay this will stay!

Hello Shoulder

She can do no wrong in my eyes, plus she looks fantabulous in this get-up! Such a KabQueen.

Eh?

So I put a pic of B for our title picture.


Like it?


I do, it's one of my favorite pictures of her anyway and it's just....hot. But don't be surprised if it changes again depending on my mood. I'm definitely figuring out ways to bump up our look so look for some more "umph" soon.


I'll have some random posts throughout the day but i'll start off with a HAPPY MONDAY!

Didn't see it coming...

Even if you're not a Grey's Anatomy fan, everyone knows the crew; and as much as you don't want to admit it, you were a little curious to find out what all the noise was about for this year's finale. For all of us that would rather jump out a building before missing GA, who saw that ending coming???? OMG, the commentator was definitely right when he said the finale would change the way you watch the show. So, of course I had heard rumors of TR and Katherine leaving the show, but not like this! I have to give mad props to Shonda Rhimes for making such good TV. I thoroughly enjoyed watching, even with two of my favorites exiting. You know it's a good show when it's still entertaining to watch after people you learned to love, leave. I have no idea what is in store for next season, but the finale has me anticipating the premiere!

PS And if you didn't previously love Derek and Meredith, the "post-it" marriage was definitely a deal sealer!

My 23 While I'm 23

On April 17th I turned 23. With that I decided that I wanted to make of list of things I wanted to accomplish while I was 23. Why I decided to do it now, who knows, but I wanted to give myself a challenge. So I thought I'd share my list with all of you, some are pretty rando but hey I'm a rando kinda girl!


My 23 While I’m 23


1. Throw a dinner party
2. Learn a new language
3. Travel to a city I’ve never been to
4. Get one last tattoo
5. Get a better score on the GRE
6. Write a novel or short story (just in case)
7. Give my mother a full makeover
8. Maintain a weight of 150
9. Wear a solid size 8
10. Hang out with my brother for one full day (because we barely even talk)
11. Play racket ball with my dad
12. Take a cooking class
13. See at least three concerts
14. Make it to 100 posts on my blog
15. Take a dance class
16. Take a vacation somewhere outside the US
17. Run in a marathon
18. Go to a strip-aerobics class
19. Go to an actual strip club
20. Give more than I receive
21. Move to a different city (or get out of St. Louis!)
22. Perform at a spoken word event
23. Become a DJ (seriously)


Got a list of your own? Do share!

Some Shavoo On The Side

So has anyone seen "Next Day Air" directed by the fine-fine that is Benny Boom? It was a movie I definitely enjoyed but if you were like me there was a certain character that may have held your attention a little longer, had your stares a little stronger and possibly make you melt with his big brown eyes. His name? Shavoo.



Gives you chills doesn't it?


No seriously this guy is gorgeous. The character "Shavoo" played a swagalicious drug dealer considering leaving the game fearing that his life is not worth the risk of fast cash


After seeing the movie his character had me in a mystery...who was this man? And where did he come from?



Well this man is Omari Hardwick who has made quite a few apperances on the TNT drama "Saved" and has had short rolls in "The Guardian" with Kevin Costner and "Gridiron Gang" with The Rock. He even started in Spike Lee's "Miracle at St. Anna" playing Platoon Commander Huggs.








Not only is this man an actor but also an established spoken word artist under the name Wise-O and even has his own album! I'm listening to clips as I type and I must say the man has skills. Check it out here



And that is why he's the man of the moment...I may be in love.





More like lust, but anyways check out the movie!

Book Worm

The summer always calls for me to read as much as I can. It's something about having a good book while chillin' in the park or sitting in the Delmar Loop people watching (for my St. Louis peeps). The few books I've read thus far have been excellent!

The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao



Now I kept hearing about this book in magazine reviews, online...was even in Noah's Arc! So I thought I'd see what the fuss was about. Now the book started of VERY slow. It was hard for me to stay interested but author Junot Diaz vividly portrays the life of an overweight dreamer who just wants to be loved...and most of all get some action. I also admired his style of writing that was hard to catch on at first since there wasn't any real quotations to know when people we're talking. But as you read on it gets easier and fun to read. Definitely recommend.


Hotlanta



I freakin’ love the Duke twins! Yeah so what the book is a teen book and I’m 23 but gosh darn I couldn’t stop reading it. Denene Millner and Mitzi Miller give a glimpse of the privileged life for African American teens living in ATL who are suckers for a brand name and a fine boy. And full of DRAMA. So much drama that you have to get the follow up book,

If Only You Knew




Which of course I’m reading at the moment so I will give updates on that soon. So my rating for Hotlanta….GET IT!!

Why Me?

So I'm not sure why all my creative juices are flowing at 11:00pm...I was supposed to be sleep an hour ago!

Ugh.


I so wanna make like three new post but I'll wait till the morn...until then night KabQueens!

All My Go Girls

So to be honest, I have a tiny girl crush on Ciara. As I'm starting to work out everyday now her music definitely gets the body moving to make me go those extra ten minutes. I'm so happy to see she ditched the ATL hats, baggy pants and the Yaki for a pair of Louboutins and fierce lacefronts...hey I'm just being honest.






Can we also say that the chick has upgraded body and fashion wise? Yes we can.





Even though this video didn't get much play, I still love it.



Work it out then CiCi...I'm not mad at you.

Photo Creds: The YBF

Using Every Minute I Got

Happy Monday KabQueens!

For some it's the start of a new week to get things moving and for others it's just a drag...today I'm guilty of both.

Hearing that alarm go off at 6:00am can be such a downer, but I remember that God gave me life again and it doesn't seem so bad. I still had a rough start this morning trying to get the ball rolling but still dragging my feet. When I got to my work and sat at my desk, it hit me.

I started reflecting on a conversation I had with Ms. Nels (who came to visit this weekend and had a fantabulous time!). Sometimes I forget that we are truly in our prime and this is the time to make our dreams happen. Both of us are very lucky to know people who are pursing their passions of music, art, fitness and making a name for themselves in the St. Louis community. But we had to realize that their dreams and their ambitions aren't necessarily ours. You know sometimes if you go to a great boutique or art store, and see the owner who might be around your age, happy with everything that they've accomplished and you think to yourself, "I can do that". Well I’m sure you could, but is it for you?

God blesses people with certain talents and passions. In what may seem easy in our eyes may not be in the eyes of the person we may be envy of. Think about it, you don't know what it took for them to get to that point, and it may very well be something that you would not be able to handle. Instead of becoming jealous of what other people have or "coveting over someone else's blessings", continue to support them and their efforts, and while you’re doing that, God will bless you with your own.

If your in the midst of finding your creativity, the things that make you tick (in a good way), or your passions, start trying new things that YOU want to do, regardless of what people may say. Use every minute you have to pursue your dreams and to find your niche in life, whatever it may be.

Don't waste another minute, get out there and do what you have to do until you don't have any minutes left.

It Must Be The Chicken

By now we have heard about the new Grilled Chicken at KFC (whoopee <---insert sarcasm). I've never been a huge fan of KFC since I was little; the only thing I enjoyed was the mashed potatoes (yum! <---insert pure joy). Now to be honest I knew it was a big deal if my grandmother was talking about it, and she does not fool with any type of fast food.

So a lovely co-worker decided to treat the office with a coupon he had for KFC Grilled Chicken. I politely decline and tell him I’ll be satisfied with my Smart One meal (while still kicking myself in the bootay because I should of cooked something better last night to take to work). When he starts talking about eating healthy and trying the chicken blah blah blah I just said fine, let me just try.

Oh and did I try.

That chicken was good!

I mean I thought it would be pretty average and make me think that I could cook something better but that chicken was the business, in my opinion. Oprah clearly knew what she was doing. But I could have done without a lot of the fat on there. Will I eat it again? Probably not, nothing tastes better than free.

So KabQ's have you tried the new famous KFC Grilled Chicken? What do you think?

And last, a food for thought....

I know Oprah donated to KFC and in return gave America a deal on some chicken but do you think it's slightly stereotypical that we're associating a black woman with chicken? (These are all the African-American Studies classes I've taken coming out) Could have it been books, beauty products? Something that could not only better African-Americans but Americans in general? Things that make you go hmmmm.....




Photo Credit: Entertainment Weekly

Just Another Reason For Me To Eat Tamales

Mmmmmmmmm....I will be consuming something like this later. Oh but don't worry I'm working out before I eat so I can EAT IT ALL.

Happy Cinco De Mayo!

Why I Love Anita Baker

Shoot, who doesn’t?


There are not too many female R&B artists that posses the qualities of sweet lyrics, an unforgettable voice and stage presence that make you remember them forever (with the exception of Alicia, Jill and even Beyonce IMO). But there is one artist who tops even those exceptions and the average singers out there. Miss Anita Baker.

Anita has expressed every emotion us queen’s feel when it comes to our relationships with the opposite sex. We’ve apologized, got caught in the rapture, enjoyed the sweet love and gave the best that we got. She knows how to preach it to the public.

I got my first introduction to Anita as far back as I can remember, so I’ll say at the tender age of around 3 or 4. There was something about that Anita cassette my mom had in our Taurus Station wagon that just put me at ease (I was not one for car rides). So for today take the time and get some Anita in your system….it does a body good.

Oh and she will be throwin' down at this year's Essence Festival, along with Maxwell too (figuring out ways to pay to get down there...)

Weight Watchers....Not Just For The Middle Age Stay-At-Home Mom

So this past February I was at my highest weight and I hated it! Everything was starting to be too small and I didn't like the way I looked in pictures. I knew I had to do something and most of all I knew I had to break my habits of eating fast food, eating late (White Castles at 3:00am was not the best choice but it sure did taste good!) and eating everything on my plate.

A good friend of mine lost over 50 lbs. being on Weight Watchers, she encouraged my roommate and I to try it and see what happens. Surely enough my roommate and I attend our first meeting and became pleasantly surprised. Not only did we get warm welcomes and support we also got the low-down on ways to break the bad habits and start better ones.

And since mid-February I'm happy to say that I've lost 13 pounds! May not seem like much but when your jeans are starting to be too big, there's not a better feeling. Now trust I don't eat all that Weight Watchers food (mainly there are some ingredients that I can barely pronounce) because I'd rather stick to lower calorie substitutions for the things I do like, but one of my favorites has become.......




Gerber Graduates Lil' Crunchies!! Yes the same Gerber babies and toddlers eat. While babysitting I was encouraging the baby to eat her cheese puffs. To demonstrate I put one in my mouth and let me tell you, as a lover of Cheetos, this is an awesome substitute! And you know how many calories it is? Barely none! Guiltless pleasure indeed! To conclude ladies, I know most magazines and commercial's are talking about getting in shape now for the summer and I know you’re tired of hearing it. But if you’re ready to make a change, do it! And do it for you! I'll continue to keep you updated on my weight-loss journey and possibly add some pictures. And lastly I'll leave you with my top 10 of my favorite snacks and meals that are not only tasty but low in cals that will help towards a weight loss goal. Gotta love it!

1. Special K Water=It's only 50 calories and it seriously takes the edge of hunger.



2. Baby carrots=You wanna get full of something get full of this! Helps especially when you need that mid-morning snack or mid-afternoon snack.




3. Applesauce=So low in calories and so yummy.



4. Special K Bars=Blueberry, Strawberry and Vanilla are my favorite. Sweet tasting, crunchy and only 90 calories!



5. Grapes=Whether frozen or not they're definitely a treat



6. Water= I can't say enough about it. It's not only helped with the weight loss but has contributed to the clearest skin I've had since middle school.

7. 100 Calorie Snacks=Honestly there are so many of them out there that it's almost hard to choose from.



8. Baked Parmesan Chicken=Tastes great and only 231 calories.... for the recepie, check out
Gina's Weight Watcher's Recipes




9. Beans=I know I know, the more you eat, the more you...well you get the idea. But they are not only good for you but extra filling.



10. Fish=There are so many ways to prepare fish that trying a new way each time makes a new tasty experience. Don't have any ideas? Try this

Consume and enjoy!